Scholastic Receives Exclusive Rights to W. Memoirs: Exclusive Report

NEW YORK, NY - April 10th 2009 - Officials for former US president George W. Bush announced today that Scholastic will receive the exclusive publishing rights to the former president's memoirs. Mr. Bush, in addition to his work at the George W. Bush Public Policy Institute and his international talks, has begun writing his memoirs. "Scholastic is a clear choice for Mr. Bush as they cater to a population most likely to relate to his way of thinking, namely, middle school students," said David Walsh, a representative for the former president. "We are very excited about the partnership between President Bush and Scholastic, and believe that the Scholastic Book Clubs will open an untapped market for Mr. Bush's memoirs."

"Scholastic Corporation is the world's largest publisher of children's books and a leader in educational technology and media," said Kathy Martell, a Scholastic spokesperson, in an interview over the phone. "Scholastic's proprietary delivery channels such as our book clubs and fairs in middle schools throughout the country, as well as our reputation for excellence in children's publishing, will provide key channels for the former president's market."

Scholastic officials also say that the same illustrator who worked on a popular Scholastic book series, Clifford the Big Red Dog, will also provide the illustrations for Mr. Bush's memoirs. The illustrator was unavailable for comment. A popup book structure is also being considered. "A popup book will provide Mr. Bush another means in which to express himself, in addition to the crayon text and large drawings," added Walsh. "And it is a major boon to Mr. Bush getting the Clifford illustrator, since that is his favorite book."

(Parody; Not True News)